Taking the time to answer these questions may require some reflection, but doing so will provide clarity amidst the daily confusion surrounding your goals and objectives.
- Why are you awaiting permission?
It is not uncommon to possess valuable thoughts and ideas that could enhance our lives, yet we often hesitate to act, believing we require explicit permission or an invitation. While we may wish to articulate our desires, seek guidance, or clarify our circumstances, we frequently remain paralyzed by indecision.
To initiate action, consider envisioning a scenario in which someone grants you permission or extends an offer that facilitates your progress. For instance:
- Your partner proposes, “Let us cease spending our weekends on household chores and hire a professional cleaner.”
- Your physician suggests, “Please feel free to reach out to me with any questions you may have.”
- The company’s website states, “If you have not located what you are seeking, please contact us to explore potential solutions.”
Visualize this scenario in your mind with as much detail and vibrancy as possible. If it appears reasonable and attainable, grant yourself permission to proceed. Alternatively, contemplate how a self-assured individual would act in your situation.
- What undermines your confidence?
In certain situations, we may dismiss promising ideas due to a desire for absolute certainty regarding their success. For example:
- “I will not attempt a new dish at this restaurant because I am uncertain whether I will enjoy it.”
- “I am reluctant to change physicians because I do not know if the new one will be an improvement.”
- “I hesitate to hire a cleaning service due to doubts about the quality of their work or discomfort with having someone else in my personal space.”
However, confidence will not materialize if we remain perpetually hesitant and fearful of experimentation. If a particular option appears more suitable and beneficial, consider trying it and observing the outcome.
If you are not prepared to take immediate action, commit to contemplating the situation for 24 hours, after which you should implement the most promising idea that arises during that time.
- What support do you require?
Complete the following statement: “The ideal version of me can accomplish… independently, but the real version of me requires assistance.”
For instance, your ideal self may be able to exercise at the gym without a trainer, while your actual self may find it necessary to have one. Alternatively, your ideal self may not require a tutor to learn English, but your real self may benefit from two hours of private lessons each week.
Reflect on how you can provide your real self with the necessary support.
- Why do you seek a success story or role model?
When faced with uncertainty regarding how to navigate a particular situation, we often feel the need for a role model.
Imagine you are 20 years old and aspire to purchase an apartment, yet you lack knowledge on how to proceed and do not know any peers who have accomplished this. If you were aware of someone with relevant experience, their story could inspire you, and you would likely seek their advice.
Once you recognize how a role model or success story can assist you in overcoming obstacles, you can begin to identify suitable individuals or explore alternative strategies.
- In what ways do you sabotage your own life?
Complete the following statement: “I undermined my life when…”
Pay attention to the initial thought that arises, and then endeavor to accept that your fixation on this thought may not reflect reality. If that situation had not occurred, what actions would you have taken, and what strengths and opportunities would you have discovered?
Strive to dismiss the intrusive thoughts that weigh you down by convincing yourself of their implausibility. The objective is not to assess the veracity of your thoughts objectively, but rather to observe how your feelings and actions transform when you adopt this perspective and cease to regard your thoughts as unconditionally reflective of reality.
