NOTE
- If you find out you are going into a preterm birth, you may be experiencing a lot of mixed emotions.
- Get advice from midwives and doctors, and talk to other parents who have experienced preterm birth.
- Relaxation techniques and positive thoughts can help you better prepare for a preterm birth.
- It is a good idea to familiarize yourself with the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU) and special care rooms before you give birth.
Before Preterm Birth: Your Mood
If you find out you are going to have a premature birth or your baby is going to die in the hospital, you may be experiencing a lot of emotions. For example, you may feel joy, love, helplessness, sadness, guilt, fear, anxiety, or sadness because your baby’s birth didn’t turn out as planned.
If you’re in a relationship, you and your partner may have different thoughts and concerns about preterm birth.
Mental and emotional preparation can help you deal with these situations before your baby is born.
Preparing mentally and emotionally for preterm birth
No one knows exactly what to expect until the time comes, but you can think about how you want to give birth and whether it’s the best way for you and your baby.
Here are some ideas to get you started:
- Read about preterm babies and toddlers. Ask questions about early pregnancy and discuss your concerns with your doctor or midwife.
- Talk to other parents of toddlers. For example, you can connect with other parents through the Miracle Babies Foundation or Life’s Little Treasures Foundation.
- Have a family plan, but keep it simple. For example, you may need to give birth in a hospital rather than a birthing center. Calm down before labor
- As you approach your due date, you may feel anxious or depressed.
The following strategies can help you manage strong emotions and stay calm:
- Do breathing exercises, deep relaxation exercises, or mental exercises.
- Engage in activities and hobbies that help you relax. For example, listening to soothing music, walking, writing, reading, or taking a warm bath.
- Take things one step at a time. For example, focus on what needs to be done today, and try not to worry about what will happen tomorrow.
- Focus on positive thoughts. For example, try to think about your baby in a calm, loving, and positive way.
- Seek help if needed. You can talk to your friends, family, or a trusted confidant. You can also talk to your doctor or midwife, or contact the Miracle Babies Foundation
Preparing for an early birth and for babies with siblings
It is a good idea to talk to older children before the hospital visit.
Talking to your child about what is happening can help reduce anxiety and confusion about changing plans. They may be worried that their baby will be born early and that the baby will be affected by it. You can tell them that they did nothing wrong and that seeing the baby will not hurt them.
Tell your child how long you and your baby will be in the hospital, such as days, weeks, and time for bed. You can make a calendar for your older child to use. It can show when they are coming to visit, and they can use it to mark the days until their new sibling comes home.
It is helpful to explain that you and your partner may be spending a lot of time in the hospital. It will also help children understand who will be taking care of you while you are in the hospital or visiting your baby in the neonatal intensive care unit or special care unit.
